How to Build Self-Confidence in Kids: Raising Children with Good Self-Esteem

How to Build Self-Confidence in Kids: Raising Children with Good Self-Esteem

How to build self-confidence in kids is a question every parent faces and looks for the answer to.

Here are 4 key steps to take to instill healthy self-esteem in kids and build their confidence in themselves.

How to Build Self Confidence in Kids:


  1. Let Kids Take Risks and Try Again


As loving parents, we often become over protective of our kids and try to shield them from the harshness that the world outside may have. However, while this may seem right in our eyes, it actually ends up doing more harm.


While you definitely must protect your children from real, physical danger, preventing them from trying new things because you think they may get hurt or worse, fail, does more harm to their self-esteem than anything else.


Encourage kids to take risks, try new things, make their own choices and when they fail, view it as a chance to tweak the process and try again.


  1. Praise but Not Over Praise


Praise is great but praising all the time or overdoing it can actually lead to kids placing too much importance on the result rather than the process. Focus on the learning, praise the effort they made, acknowledge the work they put in.


Also, praising them all the time sends the message that they don’t need to push themselves harder.


  1. Encourage Them to Set Goals and Make Choices


While we definitely want our kids to achieve goals, make the right choices and do well in life, by preventing them from taking chances, making their own decisions or setting goals, we’re actually hampering their belief in themselves.


Instead, take a step back and encourage them to make their own choices {again as long as it doesn’t physically harm them or put them in real danger} and take “healthy risks


Give them a chance to explore, try new things, develop a sense of accomplishment and deal with failure as well.


  1. Help them Enjoy the Process More than the Result


Yes, kids will fail, lose and not get what they want. All of these are essential in helping them develop a growth mindset, view failure as a chance to change the way they do things and try harder.


Acknowledge the effort they put into getting a grade or result rather than praise the result itself. Denying failure or defeat can do more damage than good to a child’s self-esteem. So, use the struggle as a stepping stone and let your kids know that your love for them doesn’t hinge on the grade they get.


Additional Reading:


Growth Mindset Books for Kids 

Growth Mindset Quotes for Kids

5 Growth Mindset Related Things to Teach Kids When They’re Not In School


How to Create a Planned Approach to Personal Growth and Self Development

How to Create a Planned Approach to Personal Growth and Self Development


Self development is an ongoing process however, as with everything else, it needs direction, encouragement and motivation.



A plan that outlines your self development goals and action items will not only give you greater clarity but also, define your purpose, the reasons and most importantly, keep you motivated.


Create a Self-Development Plan for Inspired Personal Growth


If you want personal growth that’s intentional and inspired, your first step must be to create a self-development plan.


1. List Your Goals


Start by listing out your personal growth goals for the year, the next 2 years and the next 5 years.


Break down the goals for this year, into smaller, actionable chunks that you can start taking action on right away.


For example, one of your goals for this year may be to get to your ideal healthy weight.


This “big” goal can be broken down into bite-sized action items or mini goals, like:


Start an Exercise Routine- which can be further broken down into join the gym or start running 30 minutes a day.


Cut Down Sugar and Soda Intake


Eat Right-which can be further broken down into have at least 3 servings of fruits and vegetables daily, and so on.


2. Divide Them Into Life Areas


Once you’ve listed your self-development goals, start putting them into designated life areas so you know that you’re going for all-round development and not sorely neglecting one area at the expense of developing another.


For the sake of simplicity, here are 6 key areas:




For instance, weight loss can go into health, while learning a new professional skill can go into career, using affirmations regularly will go into mindset and so on.


3. Know Your Why


Once you’ve written down your goals, spend time reflecting on the why. Why do you want to lose weight? How would it improve the quality of your life. Why do you want to save $10,000 this year? What would it give to you?


Knowing your why and writing it down will motivate you and give your goals purpose.


4. Identify Resources


Now that you know what self development goals you need to work on, it’s time to identify who or what will help you get there.


Do you need mindset training apps to keep you focused and on track?


Do you need books and courses?


Will you have to join a class or need a mentor or coach?


Knowing what you need will help you take action and put together a toolkit that’ll keep you encouraged and keep the momentum going.


5. Set Timelines


Finally, set your timelines for both the big picture personal growth goals and the smaller action items or mini goals.


By when would you want to lose that first 5 lbs.?
By when do you think you would be able to save your first $500?


Write down your timelines, aim high but keep them realistic.


Bonus: Have a Reward System in Place


A fun bonus tip when making your self-development plan is to have a sweet reward system in place. How would you give yourself a pat on the back when you meet your goals, both the big and small ones?


Rewards act as incentives and keep us encouraged and moving forward; so make your list now!


Do you have a personal growth or self-development plan in place?? Create one today!